Marriage as an institution is an artifact from prior to women’s right to vote. It’s so fucking stupid.
Human beings can choose to be monogamous, choose to be partners in personal finance or choose to be parents without a stupid religious ceremony and an apartheid sourced diamond ring being used to justify it.
I agree with this, but I understand why people would want the ceremony, the reception party, and the honeymoon vacation.
What I don’t understand at all is why anyone would make it a legal contract. Why pull the government into a private relationship? And, since they do often give certain small benefits, ask why they do that? What’s in it for your government if people are legally bound to each other? And, do the benefits for you outweigh the detriments.
The thing is, no one asks this before the marriage, when they’re all lovey-dovey and imagine “they’re the one!” and all that. And, no one who knows better is going to suggest they slow down and reconsider, evidence being all the downvotes this comment would get if this post weren’t one day old.
You’re better off leaving the government out of your private relationships, every time. You can do the ceremony however you want, it doesn’t need to be religious, and all the rest without making it a legal contract. Wouldn’t you rather have a spouse that chooses every day to be with you without any coercion, who is free to easily walk away at any point? Imagine waking up every day and they’re still there only because they want to be there with you and for no other reason.
The government has an interest in children being raised by multiple adults (more resources, more attention, more perspectives, etc). So governments incentivize it and disincentivize ending it.
Additionally, even if you don’t want kids, I think you probably want some kind of legal protection when you pool money with someone for really large expenses (houses). If they stab you in the back, you probably want some means of getting your money back.
It’s a legally codified religious practice with tax benefits, I hate it so much
I mean there are also a lot of legal benefits and protections extended to a spouse that aren’t extended to a boy/girlfriend. Depending on where you live, could mean tax credits, inheritance, how ownership of accrued assets is handled, priority guest access to ER if one gets injured, etc.
I call that: state sponsored religious entrapment.
You can get married in a courthouse without any religious connotations and call it a civil union instead if you want. The religious elements are strictly optional, and I think some codified protections for a significant other significant enough to be your spouse make sense in a way that they don’t for your new girlfriend of 3 weeks.
There was and is absolutely nothing religious about my marriage. Where are you getting this from? It’s a strictly legal contract, not more not less.
But, why even make it a legal contract?
Won’t somebody think of divorce lawyers and start divorcing again!
(I get the underlying issue, it’s just interesting hearing about it from those that benefit the most)
You think it’s EASY to write a 3 sentence letter? I need at least an hour minimum. /s
Are roommates not a thing anymore, like at all?
Before I bought a house, I had roommates I found in the classified ads and through friends (when I had friends), because I’m old and this was before the internet.
I understand that it’s harder to find apartments that rent month-to-month, and getting trapped in a lease with someone you don’t know well is a concern. Has this made it virtually impossible?
I heard there’s a resolution in Britain going through the system that would make people liable to pay their partner alimony, etc., even though they’re not married.
we all know which gender will be required to pay out.
New dystopian business opportunity: the Uncoupling app.
It matches unhappy couples based on their demography (socioeconomic status, location, etc.) and roommate preference (romance, non-romance etc.).
Two or more unhappy couples go on dates to trade roommates. It could be as simple as swapping out your unwanted boyfriend, or you might be looking for a long-term roommate while you enjoy being single.
Users can make posts to appeal to potential flatmates.
“Taco Tuesday! Yum! These would already be yours, future roomie, if you had swiped right sooner!”
“Just doing some dishes, laundry and vacuuming after getting off work. I like keeping things tidy and watering the plants. Dinner tonight is spaghetti carbonara. Emily hates it. Maybe a bro would like it more.”
Man it would be so cool if studio apartments were just affordable and people could just move out immediately after breaking up & figure their shit out emotionally without having to tie in all this financial baggage.
It’s crazymaking to me to think that this was pretty normal in the 90’s and now seems fanciful
I wish this was real, my son has been living with his ex until the lease is up.
So an app for open marriages? Call it Swapr
Swingr
Ex-Wife swap!
Goddammit it great idea, and much needed in this environment. But I see it getting bought and shittfied.
Anyway I am on board how do we make this happen?
… Claude make an app based on this post /s
For real though, as someone who bit the bullet and ended my relationship, it’s hard. I wish them well, and after they moved out I still fear one of us isn’t going to make it. Having a way to find a decent roommate easily would be nice.
Or to setup local locations of apartments where you can easily be approved and be able to move out from that awful lifestyle for up to 6 months rent free, but at the end you need to pay it all back with a significant amount of interest layed on top and the amount was already significantly more just to take advantage of people who just need to leave. Pay it all with the sale of the house or with a monthly plan kinda like school loans. 1 bonus is those 6 months your living surrounded by other divorced people so you all have stuff in common!
keep telling yourselves that your business is waning because of the economy rather than the fact people are getting married less because people figured out the system is designed to destroy one side to benefit the other.
Pretty sure divorce is still at a very high rate, and will remain so for decades
Divorce rates have been steadily declining for almost 50 years, on a per married couple basis. Add in that marriage rates have been declining, too, and you have an even faster decline of divorce filings for any given population.
My friend had to live for a year with his wife to ex-wife while trying to sell the house and her bringing guys home and he just trying not to off himself. Luckily it sold and he moved.
Should be considered psychological abuse. If an experience provokes suicidal ideation.in an otherwise normal person, it’s violence imo.
“If you leave me I will kill myself”
Congratulations, you’re now stuck with them forever.
I was wondering why I’d been seeing more billboards advertising divorce lawyers lately
This probably is happening less than it was 60 years ago
I guess more people start in a happy marriage these days and than fall out of love. I think 60 years ago more people started a marriage more like a social contract. So they both may not be truly happy, but one has a much deeper fall and may therefor be percieved as the worse option.
Okay, so everything is fine, then?
To be fair, economic safety always has been a core promise of marriage. Feminism has ended that. But in a market economy, increasing supply means falling prices. So doubling the workforce reduces wages.
What we see is how the market resolves the economic side effect of allowing women basic human rights. People can’t afford a family, so they choose not to have kids. A few generations later, the oversupply of workers will be corrected, and work will be worth enough to fund a family again.
It isn’t really necessary to solely rely on the market to fix this. And it is absurdly cruel to do so. And of course, governments have the legislative power to ease the adaptation pain. But even with a pure Epstein-class government, this problem will actually solve itself eventually. It just takes a few generations.Damn feminism, always protecting women from the crushing burden of supporting everyone else!
Holy upside-down analysis Batman. Let me clue you in to something: feminism and socialism were together from the start.
Yeah this makes total sense /s. It’s not like we have more people, so we can do more work. There is only a set amount of work available in the world.
