Finally the Britsih arrived at German humor from the 90’s.
Dutch is a made up language invented to amuse tourists
German: Durchführung des Geschlechtsaktes in der Nahrungsmittelzubereitungsräumlichkeit
Woah, you’re not even joking. Please tell me they don’t have to say that 11-syllable word every time they mention the kitchen. Please tell me they have an abbreviated way to say it.
Kitchen is Küche
Thank goodness.
That’s not a word that exists, just a compound noun. You can basically string nouns together to infinity.
Which might make sense, but it becomes really weird quickly.
For example:
I put it together, I used it, it exists now. But you’re right, I just joined some nouns for fun :)
So that’s why you guys ride your bikes so fast, you’re trying to escape compounding nouns
Noone talks like that, “Ficken in der Küche” would be the right translation.
Actually it’s “Ficken in der Küche”
*Geschlechtsaktsdurchführung
Fickvorgang
Warum liegt hier eigentlich Strohrum?
Herr Ober, schenk mir bitte noch ein Glas Strohrum ein.
Warum hast du ne Maske auf?
it just rolls off the tongue
For people who don’t know Dutch, the pronunciation is kind of like “noiken in de koiken”.
What kind of idiot doesn’t speak Dutch? Even my nephew speaks Dutch fluently and he’s like 4 years old.
More like “know ken in duh kow ken” (where “kow” is rhymes with “bow” that you shoot an arrow with).
this person dutches
That’s a very rough approximation (more German than Dutch), but I wouldn’t be able to give a better one using just English spelling without additional hints. In IPA it’s øː (with some regional variation).
Audio samples:
N American English doesn’t really have that diphthong though.
I loved working for a big corporation abroad once, along with a very petty team of gossipy Dutch people. They always kept to themselves, making fun of everyone who wasn’t part of their crew.
One day I just couldn’t tolerate their bullshit anymore, turned around in the lunch area of the office, and asked them in perfect Dutch:
You are aware that I speak multiple languages, right?
I have never seen ten people’s faces turn grey instantly before. :D
Even funnier, they begged me for days to not report them to HR.
Makes perfect sense. Turns out I could speak dutch all along if ya’ll talk slower (maybe some guiding hand gestures along the way, you know like plane controllers)
The lesser known Muhammed Ali title fight.
Jamaican: neuken in de keuken, mon
