Capt. Wolf

I’ll believe it when my CEO announces that our hiring freeze has been lifted and that we’re no longer under threat of closure. As of right now, we haven’t heard shit.

I’ll take “Things a dictator says” for 800, Alex.

Of course he wants to protect the rapists… Trump protects his own.

What’s most concerning is the message this sends his supporters… It’s totally alright to murder people who are “bad for the country.” Very sad, yes, but totally deserved because he had TDS…

But if they just put it in the title, people won’t click and get bombarded with ads! Think of the big corporations!

Yeah, first rule of a lawsuit, don’t fucking talk to anybody. Don’t give the defense anything to defend with.

Same, I’ve been renewing online for the past 12 years. This year I had to go in and they gave me a hard time over my points. Apparently you can’t have more than one letter from the same government agency. I had 2 from the DMV and was like, “This is literally you guys! Two separate forms. Two separate dates! You don’t trust yourselves enough to get it right more than once!? Like, trust me dude, nobody’s going to the DMV pretending to be me. No sane person would put themselves through that torture just to steal my identity… Nobody wants to be me, it doesn’t come with a whole lot of perks.”

Thankfully, I just had my passport renewed, so I said screw it and got my regular one.

Tomorrow, Trump suddenly develops an inexplicable, intense dislike for Namibia…

Huh… Must suck being on the end of those.

Hey… What’s this? And this? Oh jeeze, and a movement to censure?

Yup, must really suck…

Even if it did go away, it wouldn’t matter… Price goes up, price stays up. That’s how a disregulated economy works.

Bingo… This shouldn’t touch mainstream news until it’s been reviewed and reproduced.

Why not? He’s already working on bread lines.

All this tells me that there’s now a cloning service that caters to the bourgeoisie…

Hey… What’s my nose doing on the floor!? It was just on my face a minute ago!

Why’s this bloody knife in my hand? I couldn’t have done this… Could I? No… I don’t think so.

I should check it for fingerprints. What!? Only my prints are on it!?

Stranger and stranger…

This is the part when you hire a lawyer and start suing everyone for everything you can…

Or just go to the store and get a cup of icing… Mix in some extra corn starch, warm it up, whip it until it’s fluffy. Probably a similar experience… Sounds disgusting either way.

I’ll just leave this here…

My coworker gave me the same spiel and keeps complaining about how the local shoprite is too expensive and she won’t shop there anymore. My office is so hopped up on copium that I just don’t bother anymore.

Child rape… Specificity is important there.

Man, I know that feeling… Been stuck in this state for years. I’d have moved back to my home town with my wife years ago, but our parents and the rest of my wife’s family are here.

Also, not giving me much confidence about my vacation to TN in 2 weeks!