My cat brought one of these home when we lived in central America. I had no idea what it was, and I was terrified - I refused to believe the internet when they told me they were harmless and not venomous. It was a scary looking little alien.

The one pictured is much more open and spread out. Obviously getting carried in a cat’s mouth would put a tiny little creature like this in defense mode - mine was much more compact and I didn’t realize it was a spider / scorpion. Edit: the body was probably 3in/7cm long, a little shorter than credit card cut into an oval.

I would never say YOU HAVE GOT MAIL without the contracion, I would say “you have mail”, and with the contraction in the shorter sentence it sounds British to say: “you’ve mail”